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The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Week
Advertise
Lasts
Rubbing
Last
Sale
Funny
Ads
Bigs
Missed
Advertising
Paper
Already
More quotes by Yakov Smirnoff
In America, your job determines your marks. In Soviet Russia, Marx determine your job!
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It's kind of bittersweet. The human spirit is not measured by the size of the act, but by the size of the heart.
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We may have forgotten how to feel. Nobody is teaching us how to live happily ever after, as we've heard in fairy tales.
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Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile.
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In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!
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In America, you break law. In Soviet Russia, law breaks you! In America, you watch Big Brother. In Soviet Russia, Big Brother watch you!
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If you have something important to say, Broadway and New York are great places to say it.
Yakov Smirnoff
Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list.
Yakov Smirnoff
In Soviet Russia, party always finds you!
Yakov Smirnoff
I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.
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I believe that laughter is a language of God and that we can all live happily ever laughter.
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I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to.
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Comedians are always hitting the topical notes that are on everybody's minds.
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I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.
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I was not only typecast as a Russian, but I was typecast as Yakov Smirnoff. This is understandable, and I was very happy to get the roles, but it would be nice to be in a movie where I could be someone else.
Yakov Smirnoff
In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.
Yakov Smirnoff
In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!
Yakov Smirnoff
I fed my ego, but not my soul.
Yakov Smirnoff
I came to America to make it my home, and I did.
Yakov Smirnoff
My father described this tall lady who stands in the middle of the New York harbor, holding high a torch to welcome people seeking freedom in America. I instantly fell in love.
Yakov Smirnoff