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The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Paper
Already
Week
Advertise
Lasts
Rubbing
Last
Sale
Funny
Ads
Bigs
Missed
Advertising
More quotes by Yakov Smirnoff
Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list.
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If you have something important to say, Broadway and New York are great places to say it.
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In Soviet Russia, party always finds you!
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We have been learning since we were children how to make money, buy things, build things. The whole education system is set up to teach us how to think, not to feel.
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The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington.
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When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter.
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I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.
Yakov Smirnoff
I believe that love and laughter can only happen when one person takes the time to think about what would cause the other person to feel good.
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If love is the treasure, laughter is the key.
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Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there.
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Never having alone time is real tough on people.
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Russian men have a saying: Women are like buses... That's it.
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I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.
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After the Soviet Union collapsed, people thought I wasn't funny anymore.
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Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile.
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Falling in love is a chemical reaction. But it wears off in a year.
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I fed my ego, but not my soul.
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It's kind of bittersweet. The human spirit is not measured by the size of the act, but by the size of the heart.
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We may have forgotten how to feel. Nobody is teaching us how to live happily ever after, as we've heard in fairy tales.
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In America, your job determines your marks. In Soviet Russia, Marx determine your job!
Yakov Smirnoff
