Quote

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington.

Yakov Smirnoff

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Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Reason
Oklahoma
Prices
Gas
Texas
Oil
Washington
High

More quotes by Yakov Smirnoff

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I believe that laughter is a language of God and that we can all live happily ever laughter.
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Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile.
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In today's society we sometimes forget to balance our hearts and our heads this is the reason we stop laughing.
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I was not only typecast as a Russian, but I was typecast as Yakov Smirnoff. This is understandable, and I was very happy to get the roles, but it would be nice to be in a movie where I could be someone else.
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Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there.
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It's kind of bittersweet. The human spirit is not measured by the size of the act, but by the size of the heart.
Yakov Smirnoff
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A Russian Reversal quote on Uncyclopedia's Soviet Union article? How original.
Yakov Smirnoff
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If love is the treasure, laughter is the key.
Yakov Smirnoff
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When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Russian men have a saying: Women are like buses... That's it.
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In America, you assassinate president. In Soviet Russia, president assassinate you!
Yakov Smirnoff
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In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.
Yakov Smirnoff
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My father described this tall lady who stands in the middle of the New York harbor, holding high a torch to welcome people seeking freedom in America. I instantly fell in love.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Never having alone time is real tough on people.
Yakov Smirnoff
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I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Falling in love is a chemical reaction. But it wears off in a year.
Yakov Smirnoff
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I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.
Yakov Smirnoff
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We may have forgotten how to feel. Nobody is teaching us how to live happily ever after, as we've heard in fairy tales.
Yakov Smirnoff
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I fed my ego, but not my soul.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Men and women are immigrants in each other's worlds.
Yakov Smirnoff