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The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington.

Yakov Smirnoff

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Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Washington
High
Reason
Oklahoma
Prices
Gas
Texas
Oil

More quotes by Yakov Smirnoff

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In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!
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It's kind of bittersweet. The human spirit is not measured by the size of the act, but by the size of the heart.
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In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete.
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A Russian Reversal quote on Uncyclopedia's Soviet Union article? How original.
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Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list.
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In every country, they make fun of city. In U.S. you make fun of Cleveland. In Russia, we make fun of Cleveland.
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In today's society we sometimes forget to balance our hearts and our heads this is the reason we stop laughing.
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Russian men have a saying: Women are like buses... That's it.
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In Soviet Russia, party always finds you!
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In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.
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In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!
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Never having alone time is real tough on people.
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I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.
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Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile.
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Falling in love is a chemical reaction. But it wears off in a year.
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We have been learning since we were children how to make money, buy things, build things. The whole education system is set up to teach us how to think, not to feel.
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Comedians are always hitting the topical notes that are on everybody's minds.
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My father described this tall lady who stands in the middle of the New York harbor, holding high a torch to welcome people seeking freedom in America. I instantly fell in love.
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When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff
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In America, your job determines your marks. In Soviet Russia, Marx determine your job!
Yakov Smirnoff