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In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Comedy
Channels
Turn
Officer
Turns
Channel
Funny
Officers
Two
Propaganda
Back
Russia
Entertainment
Telling
Consisted
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If you have something important to say, Broadway and New York are great places to say it.
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I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.
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Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile.
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I was not only typecast as a Russian, but I was typecast as Yakov Smirnoff. This is understandable, and I was very happy to get the roles, but it would be nice to be in a movie where I could be someone else.
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Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list.
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I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.
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In Soviet Russia, party always finds you!
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Balance is so important in our lives. In our busy world, we can give ourselves balance between thinking and feeling.
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In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!
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In America, your job determines your marks. In Soviet Russia, Marx determine your job!
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In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete.
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When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter.
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Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there.
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In America, you break law. In Soviet Russia, law breaks you! In America, you watch Big Brother. In Soviet Russia, Big Brother watch you!
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I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to.
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The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.
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If love is the treasure, laughter is the key.
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I believe that laughter is a language of God and that we can all live happily ever laughter.
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I came to America to make it my home, and I did.
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