Quote

I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.

Yakov Smirnoff

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Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Like
Girls
Comedy
American
Girl
Dream
Women
Showering
Things
Sexually
Never
Russian

More quotes by Yakov Smirnoff

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I believe that love and laughter can only happen when one person takes the time to think about what would cause the other person to feel good.
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In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!
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If love is the treasure, laughter is the key.
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In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.
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I was not only typecast as a Russian, but I was typecast as Yakov Smirnoff. This is understandable, and I was very happy to get the roles, but it would be nice to be in a movie where I could be someone else.
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Balance is so important in our lives. In our busy world, we can give ourselves balance between thinking and feeling.
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I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff
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I believe that laughter is a language of God and that we can all live happily ever laughter.
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The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.
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Russian men have a saying: Women are like buses... That's it.
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A Russian Reversal quote on Uncyclopedia's Soviet Union article? How original.
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When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection.
Yakov Smirnoff
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In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!
Yakov Smirnoff
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Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Comedians are always hitting the topical notes that are on everybody's minds.
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The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there.
Yakov Smirnoff
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In Soviet Russia, party always finds you!
Yakov Smirnoff
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I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to.
Yakov Smirnoff