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My relationship with American audiences is the exact same as it always has been. They never came to see my films, and they don't come now.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
American
Film
Come
Audiences
Always
Exact
Never
Films
Relationship
Came
Audience

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The baby is fine. The only problem is that he looks like Edward G. Robinson.
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I never considered myself an artist. I aspire to be an artist, but I never thought I had the depth or substance or gift to be an artist. I do think I have some talent, but it doesn't go as far as being an artist.
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I never wanted to or expected to make a film outside of New York. New York became very, very expensive. The same $18 million spent in Barcelona or Rome goes much further there.
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What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?
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I think, on both sides of the camera or the novel: Distraction. I'm obsessed with: Can I get this actress or my third act to work? I'm distracted. I'm interested in that so I don't sit home and think, Gee, life is meaningless. We're all going to die. The universe is pulling apart at breakneck speed.
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I do the movies just for myself like an institutionalized person who basket-weaves. Busy fingers are happy fingers. I don't care about the films. I don't care if they're flushed down the toilet after I die.
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I can do a limited amount of things and that's what I do and I feel comfortable doing it and I have no particular desire to do anything else as an actor.
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I am an only child. I have one sister.
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I've had bad luck in my two previous marriages. The first wife left me, and the second did not. ­
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There's no correlation between what the public likes and what I'm after. I'm in a different world.
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I had a mad impulse to throw you down on the lunar surface and commit interstellar perversion with you.
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If you aren't failing every now and then, you're probably playing it too safe.
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Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.
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Nothing like a little post-traumatic stress disorder to make your day complete.
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In life, one is entitled to a side dish of either coleslaw or potato salad, and the choice must be made in terror, with the knowledge that not only is our time on earth limited but most kitchens close at ten.
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Relationships are really what interest me the most. And I think, in the end, they interest most people the most. Even when you read Tolstoy or something, basically they're about man and woman relationships.
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I love baseball. You know, it doesn’t have to mean anything. It’s just very beautiful to watch.
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Reality may not be the best of all possible worlds, but it's still the only place where you can get a decent steak.
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I do occasionally envy the person who is religious naturally, without being brainwashed into it or suckered into it by all the organized hustles.
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I see no advantages in aging whatsoever. You become shriveled. You become decrepit. You lose your faculties. Your peer group passes away. You sit in a room gumming your porridge. I don't see any advantage in this whatsoever.
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