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My relationship with American audiences is the exact same as it always has been. They never came to see my films, and they don't come now.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Always
Exact
Never
Films
Relationship
Came
Audience
American
Film
Come
Audiences

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I don't know enough to be incompetent.
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Jazz is a big thing with me. It's a very big passion of mine, to play it. I'm an amateur musician and I love everything about it. I was obsessed with jazz when I was 15 years old and I know a lot about it because I've loved it so much.
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Isn't all mankind ultimately executed for a crime it never committed?
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I have great faith in the actors. When they improvise, it always sounds better than the stuff I write in my bedroom. When they improvise, they make it sound alive.
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I am an only child. I have one sister.
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I think universal harmony is a pipedream and it may be more productive to focus on more modest goals, like a ban on yodeling.
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Change is almost always negative. Things degenerate.
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I'm at the stage of life when if a girl says no to me I'm profoundly grateful to her.
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Me and nature are two.
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Is there a separation between body and mind, and if so which is it better to have?
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Gauguin flew into a frenzy! He held my head under the X-ray machine for ten straight minutes and for several hours after I could not blink my eyes in unison. — If The Impressionists Had Been Dentists
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You can't ride two horses with one behind.
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Once the movie's over, there's not much point. When the thing is edited, mixed, and color-corrected, and you've finished it... In my case, I never read anything about it, I never think about it.
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Is it better to be the lover or the loved one? Neither, if your cholesterol is over six hundred. By love, of course, I refer to romantic love -- the love between man and woman, rather than between mother and child, or a boy and his dog, or two headwaiters.
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A Bay Area Bisexual told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.
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What was the scandal? I fell in love with this girl, married her. We have been married for almost 15 years now.
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Taste my tuna casserole - tell me if I put in too much hot fudge.
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I should have known something was wrong with my first wife. When I brought her home to meet my parents, they approved of her.
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I can't even make a leap of faith to believe in my own existence.
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Life is hard for insects. And don't think mice are having any fun either.
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