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Honey, there's a spider in your bathroom the size of a Buick.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Spider
Spiders
Bathroom
Honey
Size
Buick

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Ads answered out of desperation in the New York Review of Books proved equally futile as…the 'Bay Area Bisexual' told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.
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Boy, the food at this place is really terrible. The other one says, Yeah, I know and such small portions. Well, that's essentially how I feel about life - full of loneliness, and misery, and suffering, and unhappiness, and it's all over much too quickly.
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Child molestation is a touchy subject... Read the papers! Half the country's doing it!
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I'm not a big believer in the sense of Jews having a monopoly on comedy.
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I don't rely on anybody except my own judgment. I don't get much input. I don't know if that's helped me or if I would be better off if I did rely on someone.
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My films are a form of psychoanalysis, except that it is I who am paid, which changes everything.
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How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
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