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Am I my brother's keeper? Yes. Interestingly, in my case, I share that honor with the Prospect Park Zoo.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
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Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
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The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Honor
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Keeper
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More quotes by Woody Allen
I can live in Paris for four months or London or, you know, Barcelona. These are places that are like New York. But I don't think I could live in many places. When I had to make a film in the United States I picked San Francisco because to me it's one of the great cities of America.
Woody Allen
There are three rings involved with marriage. The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.
Woody Allen
My ex-wife was a philosophy major at NYU. Yeah, she and I used to have deep philosophical discussions where she would prove that I didn't exist.
Woody Allen
If I could change the structure of existence I would do it. I could see a better way to live for everybody.
Woody Allen
We Are The Sum Total Of Our Choices.
Woody Allen
God, you Jews are truly exotic. Exotic? She should only know the Greenblatts. Or Mr. and Mrs. Milton Sharpstein, my father's friends. Or for that matter, my cousin Tovah. Exotic? I mean, they're nice, but hardly exotic with their endless bickering over the best way to combat indigestion or how far back to sit from the television set.
Woody Allen
What advice would I give the average homeowner to protect himself against burglars? Well, the first thing is to keep a light on in the house when you go out. It must be at least a sixty-watt bulb anything less and the burglar will ransack the house, out of contempt for the wattage.
Woody Allen
[An audience conditioned by a lifetime of television-watching is so corrupted that] their standards have been systematically lowered over the years. These guys sit in front of their sets and the gamma rays eat the white cells of their brains out!
Woody Allen
If you don't have fun doing the film, then the results of the film will never give you any fun.
Woody Allen
When a doctor makes a mistake, it's best to bury the subject.
Woody Allen
It's very hard to keep your spirits up. You've got to keep selling yourself a bill of goods, and some people are better at lying to themselves than others. If you face reality too much, it kills you.... you've got to find an answer to the question: Why go on?
Woody Allen
She had been critical of his new torch song, A Side Order of Heartache, Please, suggesting it could be used as a good way to break in their new paper shredder.
Woody Allen
The comedies are not a million laughs on the set. Its business and the dramas are business as well, really. When I'm writing it I struggle more with drama because I started out in comedy.
Woody Allen
For the first year of marriage I had basically a bad attitude. I tended to place my wife underneath a pedestal.
Woody Allen
When I'm not working, I think and I think when I get depressed.
Woody Allen
You can be with your wife, very happily married, and then you meet some woman and you love her. But you love your wife, too. And you also love that one. Or if she's met some man and she loves the man and she loves you. And then you meet somebody else and now there are three of you. Why only one person?
Woody Allen
There have been times when I've thought about it - but with my luck it would probably turn out to be only a temporary solution.
Woody Allen
I always write the same way. I always write with a yellow pad and a ballpoint pen on my bed. And then I go and type it up afterwards. I've always done that. Those things become habitual.
Woody Allen
If my soul exists without my body I am convinced all my clothes will be loose-fitting
Woody Allen
My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker.
Woody Allen
