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I'm a teleological, existential agnostic.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Teleological
Agnostic
Existential

More quotes by Woody Allen

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If it turns out that there is a God...the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever.
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I like filming in New York a lot myself, but London is accommodating to me the weather's very good there and the conditions for shooting and the financial conditions, the artistic conditions are good, so it's a pleasant place to shoot.
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Maybe the poets are right. Maybe love is the only answer.
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Sex and death. Two things that come but once in my lifetime, but at least after death you're not nauseous.
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Until you've been kissed on a rainy Parisian afternoon - you've never been kissed.
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To me nature is... spiders and bugs, and big fish eating little fish, and plants eating plans, and animals eating... It's like an enormous restaurant, that's the way I see it.
Woody Allen
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It's a match made in heaven...by a retarded angel.
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I took a puff of the wrong cigarette at a fraternity dance once, and the cops had to get me, y'know. I broke two teeth trying to give a hickie to the Statue of Liberty.
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If I could change the structure of existence I would do it. I could see a better way to live for everybody.
Woody Allen
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And in all of Babylonia there was wailing and gnashing of teeth, 'til the prophets bade the multitudes get a grip on themselves and shape up.
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It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.
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I don't know what I'm doing, but my incompetence has never stopped my enthusiasm.
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Comedians have a tendency to have a limited range, they tend to do one thing and do it very well, but it's limited.
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Of all human weakness obsession is the most dangerous. And the silliest.
Woody Allen
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The movie is usually, for me, something organic that grows all the time. I sit home and write it, and I'm in an isolated, four-walled environment, and I don't know what's going on. I just write it, and it's appearing in my head in some idealized way where every single moment works, and every little thing is perfect, because it's in my head.
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I do the movies just for myself like an institutionalized person who basket-weaves. Busy fingers are happy fingers. I don't care about the films. I don't care if they're flushed down the toilet after I die.
Woody Allen
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Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.
Woody Allen
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I'm not saying I didn't enjoy myself, but I didn't.
Woody Allen
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I don't want to achieve immortality through my work I want to achieve immortality through not dying. I don't want to live on in the hearts of my countrymen I want to live on in my apartment.
Woody Allen
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The prettiest women are almost always the most boring, and that is why some people feel there is no God.
Woody Allen