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For God sakes, this is a woman I was married to for 10 years. We made love. I'd hold her head over the toilet bowl when she threw up.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Love
Bowls
Sake
Married
Hold
Sakes
Head
Toilet
Woman
Toilets
Made
Threw
Years
Bowl

More quotes by Woody Allen

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Notes for a ballet, The Spell: ... Suddenly Sigmund hears the flutter of wings, and a group of wild swans flies across the moon ... Sigmund is astounded to see that their leader is part swan and part woman - unfortunately, divided lengthwise. She enchants Sigmund, who is careful not to make any poultry jokes.
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Our love, our love will last forever. It's forever but it just doesn't work. That's why it will always be romantic because it can not be complete.
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I prefer the magic to reality, and have since I was 5 years old. Hopefully, I can continue to make films and constantly escape into them.
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[An audience conditioned by a lifetime of television-watching is so corrupted that] their standards have been systematically lowered over the years. These guys sit in front of their sets and the gamma rays eat the white cells of their brains out!
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Take the money and run.
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I have one last request. Don't use embalming fluid on me I want to be stuffed with crab meat.
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I'm not a big believer in the sense of Jews having a monopoly on comedy.
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It's funny. Maria Elena and I, we are meant for each other and not meant for each other, it's a contradiction.
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I always feel, I guess being a product of the movies of the 40s where movies were the greatest things and screens were big and palaces were palaces and stars were larger than life that reality was so much inferior to what we felt was conceivably possible from what we had seen in the movies.
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Then Job fell to his knees and cried to the Lord, Thine is the kingdom and the power and glory. Thou hast a good job. Don't blow it.
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Everyone wants to get out of living where they're living now, because life is a pretty tough proposition and not much fun. But when you think back to earlier times, you only extrapolate the nice things.
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Should I marry W.? Not if she won't tell me the other letters in her name.
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I don't believe in God. Just try getting a plumber on the weekend.
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I don't know what the hell I'm doing here. I'm 237 years old, I should be collecting social security.
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I like filming in New York a lot myself, but London is accommodating to me the weather's very good there and the conditions for shooting and the financial conditions, the artistic conditions are good, so it's a pleasant place to shoot.
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The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more.
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I would never wanna belong to any club that would have someone like me for a member.
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All i have in my life is my imagination
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The heart wants what it wants. There's no logic to these things. You meet someone and you fall in love and that's that.
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Is world peace possible or is the human race too innately aggressive? For instance: Have you ever seen women at a sample sale?
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