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No, I don't think you're paranoid. I think you're the opposite of paranoid. I think you walk around with the insane delusion that people like you.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
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Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
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The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
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More quotes by Woody Allen
I'm not anti-social. I'm just not social.
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Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have you declared legally insane in order to gain control of your estate.
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I'm awash in self-contempt!
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There's nothing like the discovery of an unknown work by a great thinker to set the intellectual community atwitter and cause academics to dart about like those things one sees when looking at a drop of water under a microscope.
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To you I'm an atheist to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
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He's a politician. That's a notch below child molester.
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God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.
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Do I believe in God? I did until Mother's accident. She fell on some meat loaf and it penetrated her spleen.
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I work all the time because it's a great distraction and it keeps me from sitting home and obsessing morbidly.
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I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
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I should go to Paris and jump off of the Eiffel Tower. If I took the Concorde, I could be dead three hours earlier.
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Life is hard for insects. And don't think mice are having any fun either.
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Until you've been kissed on a rainy Parisian afternoon - you've never been kissed.
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I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.
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I asked the girl if she could bring a sister for me. She did. Sister Maria Teresa. It was a very slow evening. We discussed the New Testament. We agreed that He was very well adjusted for an only child.
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I took a puff of the wrong cigarette at a fraternity dance once, and the cops had to get me, y'know. I broke two teeth trying to give a hickie to the Statue of Liberty.
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Hey listen -- I've proved a lot of things. That's how I pay my rent. Theories and little observations. A puckish remark now and then. Occasional maxims. It beats picking olives, but let's not get carried away.
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More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.
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And Nietzche, with his theory of eternal recurrence. He said that the life we lived we're going to live over again the exact same way for eternity. Great. That means I'll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.
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I think I've gotten technically better over the years but you'd have to be a fool not to. I've made so many movies that by sheer quantity you get better at the technique.
Woody Allen
