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I hate the beach. I hate the sun. I'm pale and I'm redheaded. I don't tan - I stroke!

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Sun
Hate
Redheaded
Stroke
Strokes
Pale
Beach

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I wish I could think of a positive point to leave you with. Will you take two negative points?
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You're a genius! And the proof is that both common people and intellectuals find your work completely incoherent.
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More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.
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Me sitting down for dinner with Ingmar Bergman felt like a house painter sitting down with Picasso.
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I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.
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Dying is like making love, except you don't get naseous afterwards.
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I've become the person I've always hated, but I'm happier.
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Curiosity, that's what kills us. Not muggers or all that bullshit about the ozone layer. It's our own hearts and minds.
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I learned a few things on my own since, and modified some of the things he taught me, but everything, unequivocally, that I learned about comedy writing I learned from Danny Simon.
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I consider myself a completely lucky filmmaker. I've had nothing but good luck. Everything I've needed has come my way.
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The audience goes to sleep really quickly! If you have a slight pause at the wrong time, that's it!
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It's a wonderful thing to be able to create your own world whenever you want to.
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It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.
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There's nothing good about getting older-absolutely nothing-because the amount of wisdom and experience you gain is negligible compared to what you lose. You do gain a couple of things-you gain a little bittersweet and sour wisdom from your heartbreaks and failures and things-but what you lose is so catastrophic in every way.
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I think Frank Capra was a much craftier filmmaker, a wonderful filmmaker. He had enormous technique, and he knew how to manipulate the public quite brilliantly.
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Anything worth knowing cannot be understood by the human mind.
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