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I'm trying to arrange my life so I don't have to be present.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Present
Trying
Life
Arrange
More quotes by Woody Allen
My father owned a small piece of land. He carried it with him wherever he went.
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. . . they confuse everything I do with my life.
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To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer. Not to love is to suffer.
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You are always a comedian by default. You are this way because you've been forced to be this way, but it is better to be the hero. So if you can be a persona, the great one of my lifetime of course was and is Marlon Brando.
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Enthusiasm is a good engine, but it needs intelligence for a driver.
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When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
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Nietzsche says that we will live the same life, over and over again. God - I'll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.
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For God sakes, this is a woman I was married to for 10 years. We made love. I'd hold her head over the toilet bowl when she threw up.
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I'm very old-fashioned. I believe that people should stay married for life, like pigeons and Catholics.
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What' s the matter with me? Why can't I be cool?
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One of the wonderful things about making a film of any genre is that you have dialogue. You can take up a position. If you want to say something about your position, you can just say it. You don't have to spend massive amounts of screen time.
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I'm really a timid person - I was beaten up by Quakers
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Over the years I've never written or made movies about political themes 'cause while they do have current critical importance, in the large, large scheme of things, only the big questions matter and the answers to those big questions are very, very depressing.
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The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.
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In 1940 I was just turning 5 years old and being taken to the movies. For those of us who were not old enough to understand the horror of war it was a very romantic era because these guys were kissing their wives and girlfriends goodbye and going off to fight and become heroes.
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Problems are like toilet paper. You pull on one and ten more come.
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And in all of Babylonia there was wailing and gnashing of teeth, 'til the prophets bade the multitudes get a grip on themselves and shape up.
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In real life, Keaton believes in God. But she also believes that the radio works because there are tiny people inside it.
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Those who can't do, teach!
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Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
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