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In order to be successful, all you've got to do is show up 80 percent of the time.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
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Successful
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More quotes by Woody Allen

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I'm afraid of the dark,and suspicious of the light.
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My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.
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Dear Mom and Dad, Leave $50,000 in a bag under the bridge on Decatur Street. If there is no bridge on Decatur Street, please build one.
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I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.
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Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
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Better not think too much. Relying more on the body: it is more trustworthy.
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The heart wants what it wants.
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See, I never gain an ounce, because, you know, my anxiety acts like aerobics.
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A stockbroker is someone who invests other people's money until it is all gone.
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Have you ever taken a serious political stand on anything? Yeah. Sure. For twenty-four hours once I refused to eat grapes.
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Woody Allen
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If it turns out that there is a God...the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever.
Woody Allen
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I have a limitless amount of great music at my disposal and it's very, very pleasurable because when the music goes on the film it's amazing how much it livens up the film and gives it an emotional kick in the pants, sort of.
Woody Allen
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Years ago I was on television having a discussion with Billy Graham about atheism. He was saying, even if you're right and I'm wrong, and there's nothing after, I will have had a better life than you, because I do believe there was something. And I couldn't argue with that, even though I wanted to.
Woody Allen
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Today I saw a red and yellow sunset and thought, how insignificant I am! Of course, I thought that yesterday too, and it rained.
Woody Allen
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How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
Woody Allen
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We stand at a crossroads. One path leads to despair, the other to destruction. Let's hope we make the right choice.
Woody Allen
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When you work from city to city or country to country, you work the same way the working method is the same.
Woody Allen
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When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
Woody Allen
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Everything in life turns out to be a distraction from the real thing you want to do. There are a million distractions and when I was a kid I was very disciplined. I knew that the other kids weren't. I was the one able to do the thing, not because I had more talent, maybe less, but because they simply weren't applying themselves.
Woody Allen