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My grandfather was a very insignificant man, actually. At his funeral his hearse followed the other cars.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Cars
Car
Actually
Men
Hearse
Insignificant
Funeral
Grandfather
Followed

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I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.
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When I was born my mother was terribly disappointed. Not that she wanted a girl - she wanted a divorce.
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I don't believe in an afterlife, but I'm taking an extra pair of underwear just in case.
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I wish I was writing something much more heavy each time I did a film, and that the comedies just occasionally come out. But unfortunately you're stuck with what you're born with.
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I work all the time because it's a great distraction and it keeps me from sitting home and obsessing morbidly.
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