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I'm a nice person! I have healthy life drives and goals! I don't drink, I don't smoke. I would never force myself sexually on a blind person!

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Person
Smoke
Never
Blind
Would
Healthy
Life
Drink
Nice
Goal
Sexually
Force
Drives
Persons
Goals

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I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
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My father owned a small piece of land. He carried it with him wherever he went.
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You always think another time would have been ideal for you . . . the reality is there was no novocaine when you went to the dentist.
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As the author you know how you want it to appear on screen and it's always the content dictating the form.
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Of all the wonders of nature, a tree in summer is perhaps the most remarkable with the possible exception of a moose singing 'Embraceable You' in spats.
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If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
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I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is French-kiss her.
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What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.
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You rely too much on brain. The brain is the most overrated organ.
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Skeptic that I was as an adolescent, I had recently come to believe in a Supreme Being after thumbing through a Victoria's Secret catalogue.
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I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
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There's nothing wrong with you that a little Prozac and a polo mallet can't cure.
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I can't minimize the terror factor. As you get older you get more and more frightened because the terrible indignities of old age become closer to you.
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Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.
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Life is for the living.
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I don't why whatever works and whatever doesn't. You just make the film that you enjoy making at the time, and you think there's a good chance that people might enjoy the story. You're surprised pleasantly when they do. It's just luck.
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I've always been lucky in casting. The trick in casting is to hire great people, and let them do what they do, don't interfere with them too much. And then when they're great, take credit for it in the end.
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The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what you don't have.
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After 60, all of us belong to the weaker sex.
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Curiosity, that's what kills us. Not muggers or all that bullshit about the ozone layer. It's our own hearts and minds.
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