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I'm a nice person! I have healthy life drives and goals! I don't drink, I don't smoke. I would never force myself sexually on a blind person!

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Person
Smoke
Never
Blind
Would
Healthy
Life
Drink
Nice
Goal
Sexually
Force
Drives
Persons
Goals

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Life is full of moments that are good - winning a lottery, seeing a beautiful woman, a great dinner - but the whole thing is tragic. It's an oasis that is very pleasant.
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If you are not failing now and again, its a sign you are not doing anything very innovative
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My grandfather was a very insignificant man, actually. At his funeral his hearse followed the other cars.
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When a man is driving in a car and looks out the window and notices a woman with a great body, as he strains to check her face out, how does she know to keep turning so the back of her head is always toward him?
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In life, one is entitled to a side dish of either coleslaw or potato salad, and the choice must be made in terror, with the knowledge that not only is our time on earth limited but most kitchens close at ten.
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Life is for the living.
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I've always believed that thoughtful people don't really take the tabloids seriously. They're basically a form of entertainment. I enjoy them as much as the next New Yorker.
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Human beings are divided into mind and body. The mind embraces all the nobler aspirations, like poetry and philosophy, but the body has all the fun.
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The universe is merely a fleeting idea in God's mind -- a pretty uncomfortable thought, particularly if you've just made a down payment on a house.
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Don't worry, I know almost exactly what I'm doing.
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Early in life, I was visited by the bluebird of anxiety
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Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad.
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Is Knowledge knowable? If not, how do we know?
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Of all the wonders of nature, a tree in summer is perhaps the most remarkable with the possible exception of a moose singing 'Embraceable You' in spats.
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With me it's just a genetic dissatisfaction with everything.
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Our love, our love will last forever. It's forever but it just doesn't work. That's why it will always be romantic because it can not be complete.
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People still have existential anxiety. It just may not be expressed in Hebraic idiom.
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I feel humor is important for those two reasons: that it is a little bit of refreshment like music, and that women have told me over the years that it is very, very important to them.
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I've gained no wisdom, no insight, no mellowing. I would make all the same mistakes again, today.
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People think I'm an artist because my films lose money.
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