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It's hard for me to know. I'll think, 'I really brought off my ideas, it's great,' and no one sparks to it
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Sparks
Brought
Ideas
Hard
Great
Really
Think
Thinking
More quotes by Woody Allen
Humorists always sit at the children's table.
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Don't worry, I know almost exactly what I'm doing.
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I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
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If you take a frown and turn it upside down, the person you are holding by the ankles will soon pass out.
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In a relationship, it is better to be the leaver than the leavee.
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It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.
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Human beings are divided into mind and body. The mind embraces all the nobler aspirations, like poetry and philosophy, but the body has all the fun.
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I never start editing a film until it's completely shot I don't edit along the way, ever. When it's finished I come in here [screening room] and we start with reel one, scene one and start editing shot by shot by shot until we're finished.
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In my next life I want to live backwards. Start out dead and finish off as an orgasm.
Woody Allen
Paris is particularly beautiful in the rain. It was just a nice experience for me, a pleasant experience, and I was able to present it to the world through my eyes, very subjectively - not realistically, but subjectively.
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As a boy, I was ashamed to wear glasses. I memorized the eye chart, and then on the test they asked essay questions.
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In perpetrating a revolution, there are two requirements: someone or something to revolt against and someone to actually show up and do the revolting. Dress is usually casual and both parties may be flexible about time and place, but if either faction fails to attend, the whole enterprise is likely to come off badly.
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Where did we come from? Where are we going? Is there possibility of a group discount?
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I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.
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When I was young, I wanted to be a dramatic writer, a writer of tragedy. Nothing would've pleased me more than if I could have written like Eugene O'Neil or Tennessee Williams.
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The important thing, I think, is not to be bitter. You know, if it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. I think that the worst thing you could say about him is that basically he's an underachiever. After all, you know, there are worse things in life than death.
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What is so fascinating about sitting around watching a bunch of pituitary cases stuff a ball through a hoop?
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The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.
Woody Allen
Sygmnd was a poor Austrian who'd lost all the vowels in his name in a boating accident.
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It's a match made in heaven...by a retarded angel.
Woody Allen
