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The best things in life are censored.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Censored
Best
Things
Life
More quotes by Woody Allen
I don't like to meet the actor and have a lot of conferences and talk about their sub-life and their off-screen life and their back stories and all that nonsense, because it never means anything.
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I think crime pays. The hours are good, you travel a lot
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The artist can't give you an answer that's satisfying to the dreadful reality of your existence. So the best you can do is maybe entertain people and refresh them for an hour-and-a-half.
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Who's the bigger idiot, the idiot or the idiot who gets fooled by the idiot?
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I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No.
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I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
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I didn't know he was dead I thought he was British.
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Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.
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Life is short. Short, and not about anything except what you can touch and what touches you.
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When you work from city to city or country to country, you work the same way the working method is the same.
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I wouldn't mind dying so much if it wasn't that I would be dead at the end of it.
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The baby is fine. The only problem is that he looks like Edward G. Robinson.
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Paris is a very exciting city. I learned about Paris the same way that Americans do: from the movies.
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I like writing. It keeps my mind off grim subjects. It's therapeutic in the same way a patient in an institution is given fingerpaints.
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Manute Bol is so skinny they save money on road trips. They just fax him from city to city.
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Marriage? That's for life! It's like cement!
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I'm generally not a social dramatist or comedy writer. My interests have always been more in psychological stories or personal relations and comic ideas.
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Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
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I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
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Visually I've always liked the 20s 30s for film. I do these because I like the music. I like the clothes. I like the way the women and the guys look. There are soldiers and sailors and gangsters with the machine guns in their violin cases. It's a very colorful era of New York, full of great theater and great nightclubs and great jazz.
Woody Allen
