Quote

The French make two mistakes about me. They think I'm an intellectual because I wear these glasses and they think I'm an artist because my films lose money.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Money
Myth
Film
Mistakes
Two
Wear
Years
Films
Make
Intellectual
Think
Lose
Loses
French
Artist
Glasses

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Yes, but the difference is that when you're dead and somebody yells, 'Everybody up, it's morning,' it's very hard to find your slippers.
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Over the years I've never written or made movies about political themes 'cause while they do have current critical importance, in the large, large scheme of things, only the big questions matter and the answers to those big questions are very, very depressing.
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If I can play a scene in a master shot, I always prefer it. And the actors always prefer it. It's fun to look at on the screen, the actors get a chance to sink their teeth into something substantial, and it's economically helpful.
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The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.
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I just can't listen to any more Wagner, you know...I'm starting to get the urge to conquer Poland.
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Well, if I don't get at least 16 hours, I'm a basket case.
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It's a wonderful thing to be able to create your own world whenever you want to.
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Sometimes some of the best moments are contributed by the actors being creative, with their own improvisations.
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I never thought I was doing anyone a favour by bringing children into the world. With people as cruel to each other as they are, it's a terrible proposition. The best of lives are sad and tragic. The best of them. My general conclusion is that it's not a nice thing to do. The world doesn't need it. The kid doesn't need it.
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A tree never hits an automobile except in self defense.
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I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
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See, I never gain an ounce, because, you know, my anxiety acts like aerobics.
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Paranoia is knowing all the facts.
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Showing up is 80 percent of life.
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Do I believe in God? I did until Mother's accident. She fell on some meat loaf and it penetrated her spleen.
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To me there’s no real difference between a fortune teller or a fortune cookie and any of the organized religions. They’re all equally valid or invalid, really. And equally helpful.
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Jazz is a big thing with me. It's a very big passion of mine, to play it. I'm an amateur musician and I love everything about it. I was obsessed with jazz when I was 15 years old and I know a lot about it because I've loved it so much.
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Abysmal vermin that I am, I couldn't of course tell her that it was her incredible mother that I wanted to see again… I knew only as I drove through the cold, night autumn air that somewhere Freud, Sophocles and Eugene O’Neill were laughing.
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If my soul exists without my body I am convinced all my clothes will be loose-fitting
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