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I believe in sex and death- two experiences that come once in a lifetime.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Experiences
Lifetime
Sex
Death
Two
Come
Believe

More quotes by Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
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I can't even make a leap of faith to believe in my own existence.
Woody Allen
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It's all through the actors I cannot write in that idiom
Woody Allen
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There is something about big cities that turns me on, and for whatever mysterious reason, places like New York and Paris inspire me. I think it's because cities represent civilization, and as crime-ridden and broken down as some of them are, it's still better than skipping through a meadow.
Woody Allen
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I didn't know he was dead I thought he was British.
Woody Allen
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I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.
Woody Allen
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The chief problem about death, incidentally, is the fear that there may be no afterlife - a depressing thought, particularly for those who bothered to shave. Also, there is the fear that there is an afterlife but no one will know where it's being held. On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as easily laying down.
Woody Allen
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Every success is built on the ability to do better than good enough. As you climb the ladder of success, be sure it's leaning against the right building. Eighty percent of success is showing up.
Woody Allen
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Eighty percent of success is showing up.
Woody Allen
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Don't you see the rest of the country looks upon New York like we're left-wing, communist, Jewish, homosexual pornographers? I think of us that way sometimes and I live here.
Woody Allen
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I got a divorce because my ex-wife left me for another woman.
Woody Allen
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People always ask me, Do you ever think you'll wake up one morning and not be funny? That thought would never occur to me--it's an odd thought and not realistic. Because funny and me are not separate. We're one.
Woody Allen
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I'd always wanted to be a dramatic. Comedy comes more naturally to me. I can do it with more facility. So I feel more comfortable with it.
Woody Allen
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The film studios learned to our dismay but to their pleasure that if they spent $200 million making a film they could make half a billion on it. So they were not interested anymore in quality films... They can't afford to be that risky at those prices. Consequently you're getting a lot of remakes, sequels, dopey comedies full of toilet jokes...
Woody Allen
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I'm short enough and ugly enough to succeed on my own.
Woody Allen
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I do feel it's important to have some kind of faith in something, but [it is] impossible for many of us. I personally don't have any faith in anything, but it's great if you can.
Woody Allen
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I can't imagine any director directing a screenplay of mine, because the great directors all have very personal styles, and the ones that don't are not very interesting directors.
Woody Allen
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I think, on both sides of the camera or the novel: Distraction. I'm obsessed with: Can I get this actress or my third act to work? I'm distracted. I'm interested in that so I don't sit home and think, Gee, life is meaningless. We're all going to die. The universe is pulling apart at breakneck speed.
Woody Allen
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People think I'm an artist because my films lose money.
Woody Allen
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Talent is luck. The important thing in life is courage.
Woody Allen