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I believe in sex and death- two experiences that come once in a lifetime.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Believe
Experiences
Lifetime
Sex
Death
Two
Come

More quotes by Woody Allen

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Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.
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What I do know about physics is that to a man standing on the shore, time passes quicker than to a man on a boat - especially if the man on the boat is with his wife.
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Fantasy is only a state of mind that you can employ when existing in a real context.
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See, I will always have this penchant for what I call kamikaze women. I call them kamikazes because they, you know they crash their plane, they're self-destructive. But they crash into you, and you die along with them.
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It is no secret that organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year. This is quite a profitable sum, especially when one considers that the Mafia spends very little for office supplies.
Woody Allen
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I can't even make a leap of faith to believe in my own existence.
Woody Allen
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Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not in those words.
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When you work from city to city or country to country, you work the same way the working method is the same.
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They were doing the Dying Swan at the ballet. And there was a rumor that some bookmarkers had drifted into town from upstate New York and that they had fixed the bullet. There was a lot of money bet on the swan to live.
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Where I grew up in Brooklyn, nobody committed suicide. Everyone was too unhappy.
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I'm in show business. I'm not like a poor factory worker who'd been laid off.
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The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last year.
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To me, movies are valuable as an art form and as a wonderful means of popular entertainment. But I think movies have gone terribly wrong.
Woody Allen
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Comedy just pokes at problems, rarely confronts them squarely. Drama is like a plate of meat and potatoes, comedy is rather the dessert, a bit like meringue.
Woody Allen
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I don't know what the hell I'm doing here. I'm 237 years old, I should be collecting social security.
Woody Allen
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I, interestingly, had dated a woman in the Eisenhower Administration briefly, and it was ironic to me 'cause I was trying to do toher what Eisenhower has been doing to the country for the last eight years.
Woody Allen
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I had an IQ test. The results came back negative.
Woody Allen
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Honey, there's a spider in your bathroom the size of a Buick.
Woody Allen
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I wouldn't necessarily want to be a big muscular guy. It's nice to be gorgeous whether you're male or female assuming you don't lose whatever else you have.
Woody Allen
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I never ever see a film of mine after I release it to the public. I see it when I shoot it in my dailies and while I'm editing it, re-editing it and reshooting it and all that. By the time it's finished I never want to see it again.
Woody Allen