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... years of insanity have made this guy crazy!
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Crazy
Guy
Funny
Made
Years
Insanity
Humor
More quotes by Woody Allen
It's funny. Maria Elena and I, we are meant for each other and not meant for each other, it's a contradiction.
Woody Allen
I've always been lucky in casting. The trick in casting is to hire great people, and let them do what they do, don't interfere with them too much. And then when they're great, take credit for it in the end.
Woody Allen
Money is not everything, but it is better than having one's health.
Woody Allen
I've always believed that thoughtful people don't really take the tabloids seriously. They're basically a form of entertainment. I enjoy them as much as the next New Yorker.
Woody Allen
I am plagued by doubts.
Woody Allen
Some people want to achieve immortality through their works or their descendants. I prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.
Woody Allen
I'm awash in self-contempt!
Woody Allen
A man that has never lied to a woman has no respect for her feelings.
Woody Allen
The French make two mistakes about me. They think I'm an intellectual because I wear these glasses and they think I'm an artist because my films lose money.
Woody Allen
I would never wanna belong to any club that would have someone like me for a member.
Woody Allen
I don't get depressed I grow a tumor instead.
Woody Allen
I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle!
Woody Allen
I'm so excited-I think today I'm going to brush all my teeth.
Woody Allen
Have you ever noticed that good people sleep better, but bad people seem to have more fun when they're awake?
Woody Allen
What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?
Woody Allen
You can't control life. It doesn't wind up perfectly. Only-only art you can control. Art and masturbation. Two areas in which I am an absolute expert.
Woody Allen
I'm giving [my analyst] one more year--then I'm going to Lourdes.
Woody Allen
If you can delude yourself by believing that there is some kind of Santa Claus out there who is going to bail you out in the end, then it will help you get through. Even if you are proven wrong in the end, you would have had a better life than a non-believer.
Woody Allen
I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.
Woody Allen
My gift was in comedy. I found out I could make jokes. I could tell jokes. I could write them. So over the years, that's what I've done.
Woody Allen
