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... years of insanity have made this guy crazy!

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Insanity
Humor
Crazy
Guy
Funny
Made
Years

More quotes by Woody Allen

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I'm awash in self-contempt!
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Some men are heterosexual and some men are bisexual and some men don't think about sex at all ... you know, they become lawyers.
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I've often felt that life is a hard deal and it's unrelentingly tragic and an uphill fight.
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Rather than live on in the hearts and minds of my fellow man, I would rather live on in my apartment.
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When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
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The artist can't give you an answer that's satisfying to the dreadful reality of your existence. So the best you can do is maybe entertain people and refresh them for an hour-and-a-half.
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I took a test in Existentialism. I left all the answers blank and got 100.
Woody Allen
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I feel humor is important for those two reasons: that it is a little bit of refreshment like music, and that women have told me over the years that it is very, very important to them.
Woody Allen
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I've always been lucky in casting. The trick in casting is to hire great people, and let them do what they do, don't interfere with them too much. And then when they're great, take credit for it in the end.
Woody Allen
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If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Warren Beatty's fingertips.
Woody Allen
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I wouldn't mind dying so much if it wasn't that I would be dead at the end of it.
Woody Allen
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I'm twelve years old. I run into a synagogue. I ask the rabbi the meaning of life. He tells me the meaning of life but he tells it to me in Hebrew. I don't understand Hebrew. Then he wants to charge me $600 for Hebrew lessons.
Woody Allen
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Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.
Woody Allen
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I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by two guys.
Woody Allen
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I do the movies just for myself like an institutionalized person who basket-weaves. Busy fingers are happy fingers. I don't care about the films. I don't care if they're flushed down the toilet after I die.
Woody Allen
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And in all of Babylonia there was wailing and gnashing of teeth, 'til the prophets bade the multitudes get a grip on themselves and shape up.
Woody Allen
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If you don't have fun doing the film, then the results of the film will never give you any fun.
Woody Allen
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There's no correlation between what the public likes and what I'm after. I'm in a different world.
Woody Allen
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People ask me whether I think that one day I might wake up one morning and run dry, but I've had the opposite feeling - that I would die before I had time to write all the ideas in my drawer.
Woody Allen
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I feel about New York as a child whose father is a bank robber. Not perfect, but I still love him.
Woody Allen