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I'm not a big believer in the sense of Jews having a monopoly on comedy.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Sense
Monopoly
Jews
Jew
Believer
Comedy
Bigs
More quotes by Woody Allen
If it turns out that there is a God...the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever.
Woody Allen
All i have in my life is my imagination
Woody Allen
What a world. It could be so wonderful if it wasn't for certain people.
Woody Allen
I don't like to meet the actor and have a lot of conferences and talk about their sub-life and their off-screen life and their back stories and all that nonsense, because it never means anything.
Woody Allen
The true test of maturity is not how old a person is but how he reacts to awakening in the mid-town area in his shorts.
Woody Allen
I don't rely on anybody except my own judgment. I don't get much input. I don't know if that's helped me or if I would be better off if I did rely on someone.
Woody Allen
I never have an alter ego in the movies. That's a fiction that the press has made up over the years, and it's fun to write that. It gives them something to write.
Woody Allen
I can live in Paris for four months or London or, you know, Barcelona. These are places that are like New York. But I don't think I could live in many places. When I had to make a film in the United States I picked San Francisco because to me it's one of the great cities of America.
Woody Allen
The artist can't give you an answer that's satisfying to the dreadful reality of your existence. So the best you can do is maybe entertain people and refresh them for an hour-and-a-half.
Woody Allen
How the hell do I know why there were Nazis? I don't know how the can-opener works.
Woody Allen
We laughed over it, and Hemingway punched me in the mouth.
Woody Allen
Nothing worth knowing can be understood with the mind.
Woody Allen
Show business is dog eat dog. It's worse than dog eat dog. It's dog doesn't return dog's phone calls.
Woody Allen
I hate reality but it's still the best place to get a good steak.
Woody Allen
I'd never join a club that would allow a person like me to become a member.
Woody Allen
I'm really impotent against the overwhelming bleakness of the universe and the only thing I can do is my little gift [filmmaking] and do it the best I can, [...] which is cold comfort.
Woody Allen
You'll live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to.
Woody Allen
Men would make love with any number of women ... even total strangers, while females were selective. They were catering to the demands of one small egg. While males had millions of frantic sperms screaming: Let us out, let us out!.
Woody Allen
I see the glass half full...but of poison.
Woody Allen
Tradition is the illusion of permanance.
Woody Allen
