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Everyone wants to get out of living where they're living now, because life is a pretty tough proposition and not much fun. But when you think back to earlier times, you only extrapolate the nice things.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Think
Pretty
Thinking
Nice
Extrapolate
Life
Times
Proposition
Everyone
Propositions
Living
Earlier
Back
Tough
Much
Fun
Things
Wants

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I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
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It's a match made in heaven...by a retarded angel.
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Some people think about sex all the time some people think of sex some of the time and some people never think about sex: they become lawyers.
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I think [aging] has nothing to recommend it. You don't gain any wisdom as the years go by. You fall apart, is what happens. People try and put a nice varnish on it, and say, well, you mellow. You come to understand life and accept things. But you'd trade all of that for being 35 again.
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I had a mad impulse to throw you down on the lunar surface and commit interstellar perversion with you.
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My father owned a small piece of land. He carried it with him wherever he went.
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When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
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I don't why whatever works and whatever doesn't. You just make the film that you enjoy making at the time, and you think there's a good chance that people might enjoy the story. You're surprised pleasantly when they do. It's just luck.
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I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.
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To me nature is... spiders and bugs, and big fish eating little fish, and plants eating plans, and animals eating... It's like an enormous restaurant, that's the way I see it.
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The audience is making the film and not the film-maker.
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I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
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Anything worth knowing cannot be understood by the human mind.
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The best an idea gets is when its in your head.
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The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.
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Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
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Every success is built on the ability to do better than good enough. As you climb the ladder of success, be sure it's leaning against the right building. Eighty percent of success is showing up.
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The prison psychiatrist asked me if I thought sex was dirty. I told him only when it's done right.
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There are worse things than death. Many of them playing at a theater near you.
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Therefore, to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down.
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