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Some men are heterosexual and some men are bisexual and some men don't think about sex at all ... you know, they become lawyers.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Think
Thinking
Heterosexual
Bisexual
Lawyers
Lawyer
Sex
Become
Men

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I keep getting more and more ambitious. Over the years, to some degree, in some areas, I feel I've grown. In some areas, I made a fool of myself. In some areas, I think I can still do some funny things.
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Why ruin a good story with the truth?
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It's all through the actors I cannot write in that idiom
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Life is full of moments that are good - winning a lottery, seeing a beautiful woman, a great dinner - but the whole thing is tragic. It's an oasis that is very pleasant.
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Sentence structure is innate, but whining is acquired.
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Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.
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Someday the lion is going to lie down with the lamb, but the lamb isn't going to get much sleep.
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I'm giving [my analyst] one more year--then I'm going to Lourdes.
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People always ask me, Do you ever think you'll wake up one morning and not be funny? That thought would never occur to me--it's an odd thought and not realistic. Because funny and me are not separate. We're one.
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All over the world, relationships between men and women are very, very tricky and very difficult and you don't learn anything. It's not an exact science, so you can't learn anything. You're always going by instinct and your instinct betrays you because you want what you want when you want it.
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It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.
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A stockbroker is someone who invests other people's money until it is all gone.
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One man starving puts a crimp in my evening.
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There's nothing like the discovery of an unknown work by a great thinker to set the intellectual community atwitter and cause academics to dart about like those things one sees when looking at a drop of water under a microscope.
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I'm not anti-social. I'm just not social.
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If you aren't failing, you aren't trying.
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I can't even make a leap of faith to believe in my own existence.
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Raised by two mothers...wow, most of us barely survive one
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To me, movies are valuable as an art form and as a wonderful means of popular entertainment. But I think movies have gone terribly wrong.
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I am two with nature.
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