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If you take a frown and turn it upside down, the person you are holding by the ankles will soon pass out.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Turns
Ankles
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Upside
Person
Holding
Take
Stupidity
God
Pass
Soon
Turn
Frown
More quotes by Woody Allen
I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is French-kiss her.
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Take the money and run.
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She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set of parabolas that could cause cardiac arrest in a yak.
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In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows.
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To me nature is... spiders and bugs, and big fish eating little fish, and plants eating plans, and animals eating... It's like an enormous restaurant, that's the way I see it.
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I don't think my film style has changed. I'm doing the same kind of jokes I did when I was younger.
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You can't ride two horses with one behind.
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If God exists, I hope he has a good excuse.
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My relationship with American audiences is the exact same as it always has been. They never came to see my films, and they don't come now.
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The heart wants what it wants.
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The whole concept of awards is silly. I cannot abide by the judgment of other people, because if you accept it when they say you deserve an award, then you have to accept it when they say you don't.
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Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
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And Nietzche, with his theory of eternal recurrence. He said that the life we lived we're going to live over again the exact same way for eternity. Great. That means I'll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.
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I could turn on my radio in the morning when I was getting dressed for school and hear Frank Sinatra and Duke Ellington and Benny Goodman and think this is the music. Now that music is art. Ellington is art. At that time it was just what you heard on the radio. Cole Porter was just a guy who wrote pretty songs and Billie Holliday would sing them.
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I never ever see a film of mine after I release it to the public. I see it when I shoot it in my dailies and while I'm editing it, re-editing it and reshooting it and all that. By the time it's finished I never want to see it again.
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Where I grew up in Brooklyn, nobody committed suicide. Everyone was too unhappy.
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Since I was a kid, I could make up stories, I could make up funny jokes and I could always do it. When I'm walking down the street or having dinner, ideas will hit me, and I write them down on matchbooks or napkins and throw them in the draw.
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In order to be successful, all you've got to do is show up 80 percent of the time.
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He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an Armenian.
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If you're born with a gift, to behave like it's an achievement is not right.
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