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I can't enjoy anything unless everybody is. If one guy is starving someplace, that puts a crimp in my evening.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Unless
Everybody
Guy
Enjoy
Someplace
Anything
Starving
Puts
Evening

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I'm so excited-I think today I'm going to brush all my teeth.
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I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.
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If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right.
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Notes for a ballet, The Spell: ... Suddenly Sigmund hears the flutter of wings, and a group of wild swans flies across the moon ... Sigmund is astounded to see that their leader is part swan and part woman - unfortunately, divided lengthwise. She enchants Sigmund, who is careful not to make any poultry jokes.
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Ninety percent of life is just showing up.
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Why not? Life is short, life is dull, life is full of pain - and this is a chance for something special.
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New York is my home and I have a particular fondness for it. I think it's a place where you can generate any kind of story wonderfully. But I also would be very happy to make a film in Paris or Rome.
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The best an idea gets is when its in your head.
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We laughed over it, and Hemingway punched me in the mouth.
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Curiosity, that's what kills us. Not muggers or all that bullshit about the ozone layer. It's our own hearts and minds.
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I cannot say for certain that God does not exist I think the worst thing that can be said about him is that he's a bit of an underachiever.
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It's a match made in heaven...by a retarded angel.
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I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.
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I've had a very productive life. I've worked very hard, I've never fallen prey to depression. I'm not sure I could have done all of that without being in psychoanalysis.
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Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right.
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I've often felt that life is a hard deal and it's unrelentingly tragic and an uphill fight.
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As I got more confident, I was able to let actors improvise, and do long takes. It's 10%, 5% you learn and experience. The rest you just have or you don't have.
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Dear Mom and Dad, Leave $50,000 in a bag under the bridge on Decatur Street. If there is no bridge on Decatur Street, please build one.
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