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I am plagued by doubts.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Plagued
Doubts
Doubt

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Umlaut snaps around and we cut to a blond apparition in her early twenties, clearly descended from Olympus by way of Hugh Hefner's mansion.
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Showing up is 80 percent of life.
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Your audience teaches you how to be funny.
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The film studios learned to our dismay but to their pleasure that if they spent $200 million making a film they could make half a billion on it. So they were not interested anymore in quality films... They can't afford to be that risky at those prices. Consequently you're getting a lot of remakes, sequels, dopey comedies full of toilet jokes...
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I've been lucky because my films have consistently made a profit, almost all of them have made a profit. Never a huge profit, but nobody gets hurt. And therefore I get a lot of freedom.
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The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last year.
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My wife is immature. Whenever I take a bath, she sinks my boats.
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If you're born with a gift, to behave like it's an achievement is not right.
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Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.
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The chief problem about death, incidentally, is the fear that there may be no afterlife - a depressing thought, particularly for those who bothered to shave. Also, there is the fear that there is an afterlife but no one will know where it's being held. On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as easily laying down.
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I don't fear death. - I just don't want to be around when it happens.
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Every hooker I ever speak to tells me that it beats the hell out of waitressing.
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Life is horrible, but it is not relentlessly black from wire to wire. You can sit down and hear a Mozart symphony, or you can watch the Marx Brothers, and this will give you a pleasant escape for a while. And that is about the best that you can do.
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Who's the bigger idiot, the idiot or the idiot who gets fooled by the idiot?
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Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.
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I'm at the stage of life when if a girl says no to me I'm profoundly grateful to her.
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Sex on Twitter can't hurt you - unless you fall off.
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Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem.
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One of the wonderful things about making a film of any genre is that you have dialogue. You can take up a position. If you want to say something about your position, you can just say it. You don't have to spend massive amounts of screen time.
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You're a genius! And the proof is that both common people and intellectuals find your work completely incoherent.
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