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I'm a creature of the New York City streets.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Streets
Cities
Creature
York
Creatures
City
More quotes by Woody Allen
Raised by two mothers...wow, most of us barely survive one
Woody Allen
People always ask me, Do you ever think you'll wake up one morning and not be funny? That thought would never occur to me--it's an odd thought and not realistic. Because funny and me are not separate. We're one.
Woody Allen
Where did we come from? Where are we going? Is there possibility of a group discount?
Woody Allen
I took a test in Existentialism. I left all the answers blank and got 100.
Woody Allen
Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
Woody Allen
I'm not a big believer in the sense of Jews having a monopoly on comedy.
Woody Allen
Men learn to love the woman they are attracted to. Women learn to become attracted to the man they fall in love with.
Woody Allen
Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.
Woody Allen
I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go down and meet them with baseball bats. (On the KKK)
Woody Allen
When I was young, I wanted to be a dramatic writer, a writer of tragedy. Nothing would've pleased me more than if I could have written like Eugene O'Neil or Tennessee Williams.
Woody Allen
I don't want to live forever through my work. I want to live forever by not dying.
Woody Allen
You can be distracted by your love life, by the baseball game, movies, by the nonsense. Can I get my kid into this private school? Can I get this girl to go out with me Saturday night? Am I going to get the promotion in my office? All this stuff, but in the end the universe burns out. So I think it's completely meaningless.
Woody Allen
In every generation there are a few people who are authentically funny. The cosmetics change. You may not be able to articulate it, and you may laugh at them and get a certain amount of enjoyment. But when you're asleep at night, and you wake up at 3 in the morning, and you're alone in your bed, you know who's really funny.
Woody Allen
I think it's my job or the artist's job, to try and find some solution or some reason to accept things. But given the grimmest reality, I feel the grimmest facts are the real facts, the true facts: that you're born, you die, you suffer, it's to no purpose, and you're gone forever, ever, ever, and that's it.
Woody Allen
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
Woody Allen
The heart wants what it wants. There's no logic to these things. You meet someone and you fall in love and that's that.
Woody Allen
Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
Woody Allen
Marriage? That's for life! It's like cement!
Woody Allen
Why not? Life is short, life is dull, life is full of pain - and this is a chance for something special.
Woody Allen
I feel humor is important for those two reasons: that it is a little bit of refreshment like music, and that women have told me over the years that it is very, very important to them.
Woody Allen
