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My experience creatively is different than my experience in life, for, as my father would say, the simple reason that you can't get hurt when everything goes wrong creatively.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Everything
Creatively
Different
Goes
Would
Hurt
Life
Wrong
Simple
Experience
Father
Reason

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I have one last request. Don't use embalming fluid on me I want to be stuffed with crab meat.
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There is dignity in suffering nobility in pain but failure is a salted wound, that burns and burns again!
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My father owned a small piece of land. He carried it with him wherever he went.
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Writing is great because in the writing you never have to... First of all you never have to leave your home. And you never have to meet the test of reality when you're writing.
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Hey listen -- I've proved a lot of things. That's how I pay my rent. Theories and little observations. A puckish remark now and then. Occasional maxims. It beats picking olives, but let's not get carried away.
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Chastity is curable, if detected early.
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That’s one of the nice things about writing, or any art if the thing’s real, it just lives.
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I spend a lot of time idly. I go to sporting events, play my clarinet. I practise. But if you work every day, a certain amount on a steady basis, the work accumulates.
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I think if you have a comic perspective, almost anything that happens you tend to put through a comic filter. It's a way of coping in the short term, but has no long term effect and requires constant, endless renewal. Hence people talk of comics who are always on. It's like constantly drugging your sensibility so you can get by with less pain.
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I took a test in Existentialism. I left all the answers blank and got 100.
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I didn't know he was dead I thought he was British.
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There are three things Jewish people worship-God, Chinese food and wall-to-wall carpeting.
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Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad.
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