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In real life, Keaton believes in God. But she also believes that the radio works because there are tiny people inside it.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
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Real
Keaton
Believe
Believes
Life
Tiny
People
Radio
Atheism
Works
Inside
More quotes by Woody Allen
I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.
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No matter what the shrinks, or the pundits, or the self-help books tell you, when it comes to love, it's luck.
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I don't own a computer. I've never seen anything online at all - nothing. I don't own a word processor. I have none of that stuff. It's not an act of rebellion. I'm just not a gadget person.
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I do occasionally envy the person who is religious naturally, without being brainwashed into it or suckered into it by all the organized hustles.
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If I just got up in the morning and had no place to go and was retired or something, I would be sitting there and be thinking, Gee, what is the purpose of life? Why are we all finite? Why do we get old and die? Is there nothing out there? Why is it so tragic? Why do our loved ones perish? Why do we generate? Who wants to think about that stuff
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You can't anticipate in the room the riches of what you encounter when you're location hunting for a movie.
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Those who can't do, teach. And those who can't teach, teach gym.
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The last woman I was in was the Statue of Liberty.
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We knew the front door was always left open, but we broke in just to keep in practice. Doxy turned all the Washburn family photos to the wall so there wouldn't be any witnesses.
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My wife is immature. Whenever I take a bath, she sinks my boats.
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It's important to control yourself because life gets too complicated if you don't, but the impulse is often there for people. Some say society should be more open. That doesn't work either.
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I hate reality but it's still the best place to get a good steak.
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I think universal harmony is a pipedream and it may be more productive to focus on more modest goals, like a ban on yodeling.
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If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
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I loathed every day and regret every moment I spent in a school.
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Some drink deeply from the river of knowledge. Others only gargle.
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Standard mathematics has recently been rendered obsolete by the discovery that for years we have been writing the numeral five backward. This has led to reevaluation of counting as a method of getting from one to ten. Students are taught advanced concepts of Boolean algebra, and formerly unsolvable equations are dealt with by threats of reprisals.
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Fantasy is only a state of mind that you can employ when existing in a real context.
Woody Allen
When I'm writing something, if there's a part that's good for me, then I'll play it. Otherwise, I don't. And I notice that there are less and less parts for me in my own writing.
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I'm awash in self-contempt!
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