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There's no rhyme or reason to anything that I do. It's whatever seems right at the time.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Right
Time
Rhyme
Whatever
Seems
Anything
Reason

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The heart wants what it wants.
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Life is for the living.
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I'm short enough and ugly enough to succeed on my own.
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Sex is like having dinner: sometimes you joke about the dishes, sometimes you take the meal seriously.
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Man cannot live by bread alone. Every once in awhile he needs a salad.
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I can levitate birds. No one cares.
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[Stanley] Kubrick was a great artist and a perfectionist. He always wanted the exact right thing. He did a million takes. Everything had to be perfect. I'm an imperfectionist. I don't really care that much about the work. I write quickly. I'm careless. I shoot carelessly.
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Is Knowledge knowable? If not, how do we know?
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If you pursue the other woman, it's a losing situation and it's not good for your relationship or your marriage. If your marriage is open and you're allowed to, that's no good either. There's no way, really in the end, to be happy unless you get very lucky.
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Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem.
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Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
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Maybe the poets are right. Maybe love is the only answer.
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I usually want to crawl into the ground after I make a film, almost invariably.
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Then Job fell to his knees and cried to the Lord, Thine is the kingdom and the power and glory. Thou hast a good job. Don't blow it.
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If you aren't failing every now and then, you're probably playing it too safe.
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I write about what I want to write about, and so the film comes out as a very personal expression even if its subject matter is totally prefabricated.
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Some people want to achieve immortality through their works or their descendants. I prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.
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When I asked my mother where babies came from, she thought I said rabies. She said you get them from being bitten by a dog. The next week, a woman on my block gave birth to triplets... I thought she'd been bitten by a Great Dane.
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Those who can't do, teach!
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There's nothing wrong with you that a little Prozac and a polo mallet can't cure.
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