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I know what I think but I don't know how to put it into words. Maybe I could get a little bit drunk and dance it for you.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Bits
Maybe
Words
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Little
Think
Thinking
Drunk
Dance
More quotes by Woody Allen
Paranoia is knowing all the facts.
Woody Allen
Marriage? That's for life! It's like cement!
Woody Allen
All the crap they tell you about... getting joy and having a kind of wisdom in your golden years - it's all tripe.
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Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have you declared legally insane in order to gain control of your estate.
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I always thought it would be very funny if I was a blind film director.
Woody Allen
Geez, I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get, and just enjoy it while it lasts.
Woody Allen
I never start editing a film until it's completely shot I don't edit along the way, ever. When it's finished I come in here [screening room] and we start with reel one, scene one and start editing shot by shot by shot until we're finished.
Woody Allen
I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.
Woody Allen
If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative.
Woody Allen
Eighty percent of success is showing up.
Woody Allen
If my soul exists without my body I am convinced all my clothes will be loose-fitting
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In my next life I want to live backwards. Start out dead and finish off as an orgasm.
Woody Allen
My films are a form of psychoanalysis, except that it is I who am paid, which changes everything.
Woody Allen
Am I my brother's keeper? Yes. Interestingly, in my case, I share that honor with the Prospect Park Zoo.
Woody Allen
Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.
Woody Allen
You can't ride two horses with one behind.
Woody Allen
I do the movies just for myself like an institutionalized person who basket-weaves. Busy fingers are happy fingers. I don't care about the films. I don't care if they're flushed down the toilet after I die.
Woody Allen
Take the money and run.
Woody Allen
It's very hard to keep your spirits up. You've got to keep selling yourself a bill of goods, and some people are better at lying to themselves than others. If you face reality too much, it kills you.... you've got to find an answer to the question: Why go on?
Woody Allen
Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.
Woody Allen