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I wish I was writing something much more heavy each time I did a film, and that the comedies just occasionally come out. But unfortunately you're stuck with what you're born with.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Time
Comedy
Wish
Born
Film
Comedies
Come
Occasionally
Writing
Unfortunately
Much
Stuck
Something
Heavy

More quotes by Woody Allen

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If I could change the structure of existence I would do it. I could see a better way to live for everybody.
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I'm afraid of the dark,and suspicious of the light.
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Usually, you hire people that you think are wonderful.
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You look up after many years and you find that a film has become a classic because it's meaningful to people and alive, decade after decade.
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Over the years I've never written or made movies about political themes 'cause while they do have current critical importance, in the large, large scheme of things, only the big questions matter and the answers to those big questions are very, very depressing.
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I'd never join a club that would allow a person like me to become a member.
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If you take a frown and turn it upside down, the person you are holding by the ankles will soon pass out.
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When I naturally write a story and I feel that the guy is sitting across the table from the girl and flirting with her... I think, 'God, that can't be me' because I'm just too old for that part. You need a 30-year-old or a 35-year-old for that part. And so I've given myself less and less roles.
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When a doctor makes a mistake, it's best to bury the subject.
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Since I was a kid, I could make up stories, I could make up funny jokes and I could always do it. When I'm walking down the street or having dinner, ideas will hit me, and I write them down on matchbooks or napkins and throw them in the draw.
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If man were immortal, do you realize what his meat bills would be?
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I, interestingly, had dated a woman in the Eisenhower Administration briefly, and it was ironic to me 'cause I was trying to do toher what Eisenhower has been doing to the country for the last eight years.
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Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
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You know, it's one thing about intellectuals, they prove that you can be absolutely brilliant and have no idea what's going on.
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Comedy just pokes at problems, rarely confronts them squarely. Drama is like a plate of meat and potatoes, comedy is rather the dessert, a bit like meringue.
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Please forgive me. My pedicurist had a stroke. She fell forward onto the orange stick and plunged it into my toe. It required bandaging.
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Just don't take any class where you have to read BEOWULF.
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See, I never gain an ounce, because, you know, my anxiety acts like aerobics.
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To me nature is... spiders and bugs, and big fish eating little fish, and plants eating plans, and animals eating... It's like an enormous restaurant, that's the way I see it.
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I've always had an easy time directing actors because I always hire ones that are great before I get my hands on them.
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