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I sold my memoirs of my love life to Parker Brothers and they are going to make a game out of it.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
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The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Brother
Game
Games
Parker
Funny
Memoirs
Going
Companionship
Make
Memoir
Love
Sold
Life
Brothers
More quotes by Woody Allen
Skeptic that I was as an adolescent, I had recently come to believe in a Supreme Being after thumbing through a Victoria's Secret catalogue.
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Have you ever noticed that good people sleep better, but bad people seem to have more fun when they're awake?
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The difference between sex and death is, death you can do alone and nobody laughs at you.
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I don't want to be immortal through my works. I want to be immortal by not dying.
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My grandfather was a very insignificant man, actually. At his funeral his hearse followed the other cars.
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Sex on Twitter can't hurt you - unless you fall off.
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I was a smart kid and I was not understood by my parents.
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Please forgive me. My pedicurist had a stroke. She fell forward onto the orange stick and plunged it into my toe. It required bandaging.
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The audience is making the film and not the film-maker.
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People think I'm an artist because my films lose money.
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The French make two mistakes about me. They think I'm an intellectual because I wear these glasses and they think I'm an artist because my films lose money.
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History is the same thing over and over again.
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The important thing, I think, is not to be bitter. You know, if it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. I think that the worst thing you could say about him is that basically he's an underachiever. After all, you know, there are worse things in life than death.
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Of all the wonders of nature, a tree in summer is perhaps the most remarkable with the possible exception of a moose singing 'Embraceable You' in spats.
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I feel about New York as a child whose father is a bank robber. Not perfect, but I still love him.
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A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life.
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I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle!
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Take the money and run.
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Talent is luck. The important thing in life is courage.
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To me, movies are valuable as an art form and as a wonderful means of popular entertainment. But I think movies have gone terribly wrong.
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