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Nietzsche says that we will live the same life, over and over again. God - I'll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
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The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
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Life
Nietzsche
Rebirth
Ice
Comedian
More quotes by Woody Allen
A Bay Area Bisexual told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.
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For some reason I'm more appreciated in France than I am back home. The subtitles must be incredibly good.
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If I could only see one miracle, just one miracle. Like a burning bush, or the seas part, or my uncle Sasha pick up a check.
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When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
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I have no regard for that kind of ceremony. I just don't think they know what they're doing. When you see who wins those things-or who doesn't win them-you can see how meaningless this Oscar thing is.
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The whole thrust of science and the medical profession is to try and prevent it from happening, to try to prolong life, to keep you from dying, to keep you from getting older, to rejuvenate you. I mean, that's everybody's wish. The fountain of youth is everybody's sought-after thing.
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They were doing the Dying Swan at the ballet. And there was a rumor that some bookmarkers had drifted into town from upstate New York and that they had fixed the bullet. There was a lot of money bet on the swan to live.
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If you're not failing, you're not trying anything.
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The chief problem about death ... is the fear that there may be no afterlife - a depressing thought.
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Standing in a garage no more makes you a car than standing in a church makes you a Christian.
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Life is a concentration camp. You're stuck here and there's no way out and you can only rage impotently against your persecutors.
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I took a puff of the wrong cigarette at a fraternity dance once, and the cops had to get me, y'know. I broke two teeth trying to give a hickie to the Statue of Liberty.
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Take the money and run.
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See, I never gain an ounce, because, you know, my anxiety acts like aerobics.
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Your self-esteem is a notch below Kafka.
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No, I don't think you're paranoid. I think you're the opposite of paranoid. I think you walk around with the insane delusion that people like you.
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I'm so excited-I think today I'm going to brush all my teeth.
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What is so fascinating about sitting around watching a bunch of pituitary cases stuff a ball through a hoop?
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Those modern analysts, they charge so much! In my day, for five marks Freud himself would treat you. For ten marks he would treat you and press your pants. For fifteen marks Freud would let you treat him - that included a choice of any two vegetables.
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You can't control life. It doesn't wind up perfectly. Only-only art you can control. Art and masturbation. Two areas in which I am an absolute expert.
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