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A tree never hits an automobile except in self defense.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Never
Automobile
Hits
Forests
Driving
Defense
Except
Tree
Self
More quotes by Woody Allen
Maybe the poets are right. Maybe love is the only answer.
Woody Allen
Should I marry W? Not if she won't tell me the other letters in her name. And what about her career? How can I ask a woman of her beauty to give up the Roller Derby? Decisions...
Woody Allen
You can't anticipate in the room the riches of what you encounter when you're location hunting for a movie.
Woody Allen
While we're waiting for a cab I'll give you your lesson for today. Don't listen to what your teachers tell ya, you know. Don't pay attention. Just, just see what they look like and that's how you'll know what life is really gonna be like.
Woody Allen
The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.
Woody Allen
I have a hyper-active imagination, my mind tends to jump around a little, and I have some trouble between fantasy and reality.
Woody Allen
If man were immortal, do you realize what his meat bills would be?
Woody Allen
We knew the front door was always left open, but we broke in just to keep in practice. Doxy turned all the Washburn family photos to the wall so there wouldn't be any witnesses.
Woody Allen
Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
Woody Allen
The key point about a demonstration is that it must be seen. Hence the term demonstration. If a person demonstrates privately in his own home, this is not technically a demonstration but merely acting silly or behaving like an ass.
Woody Allen
In fact, when they wake up in the morning, they're Jack Nicholson or Robert De Niro or Josh Brolin. And it's built-in, but they think it's all this other stuff. But it's not. They'd be great if they didn't think about their part or if they did think about it.
Woody Allen
If you're born with a gift, to behave like it's an achievement is not right.
Woody Allen
I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
Woody Allen
If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.
Woody Allen
Our love, our love will last forever. It's forever but it just doesn't work. That's why it will always be romantic because it can not be complete.
Woody Allen
I'm awash in self-contempt!
Woody Allen
I want to return to the womb, anyone's.
Woody Allen
At the trial Stubbs chose to act as his own lawyer, but a conflict over his fee led to ill feelings.
Woody Allen
I love nature, I just don't want to get any of it on me.
Woody Allen
Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more fun.
Woody Allen
