Quote

Is old age really so terrible? Not if you've brushed your teeth faithfully.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Really
Brushed
Faithfully
Maturity
Teeth
Terrible
Age

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I know what I think but I don't know how to put it into words. Maybe I could get a little bit drunk and dance it for you.
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I've had a very productive life. I've worked very hard, I've never fallen prey to depression. I'm not sure I could have done all of that without being in psychoanalysis.
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Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
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Honey! Bring down a copy of my will - and an eraser!
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Standard mathematics has recently been rendered obsolete by the discovery that for years we have been writing the numeral five backward. This has led to reevaluation of counting as a method of getting from one to ten. Students are taught advanced concepts of Boolean algebra, and formerly unsolvable equations are dealt with by threats of reprisals.
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I love nature, I just don't want to get any of it on me.
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Nietzsche says that we will live the same life, over and over again. God - I'll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.
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Just don't take any class where you have to read BEOWULF.
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I'm a nice person! I have healthy life drives and goals! I don't drink, I don't smoke. I would never force myself sexually on a blind person!
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I think I've gotten technically better over the years but you'd have to be a fool not to. I've made so many movies that by sheer quantity you get better at the technique.
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It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
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When I get up in the morning, I go and I work with beautiful women and charming men and funny comedians and dramatic artists. And I'm presented with costumes and great music to choose from and sets. I travel a certain amount of places, so I've been living in a bubble. And I like it.
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I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in braille. I used to rub the dirty parts.
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Inertia accounts for two-thirds of marriages. But love accounts for the other third.
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In 1940 I was just turning 5 years old and being taken to the movies. For those of us who were not old enough to understand the horror of war it was a very romantic era because these guys were kissing their wives and girlfriends goodbye and going off to fight and become heroes.
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Jazz is a big thing with me. It's a very big passion of mine, to play it. I'm an amateur musician and I love everything about it. I was obsessed with jazz when I was 15 years old and I know a lot about it because I've loved it so much.
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Every time you make a movie it's a new and different experience. You learn very little from the past. So, I'm a little bit better than I was when I first started.
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Don't worry, I know almost exactly what I'm doing.
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We live in far too permissive a society. Never before has pornography been this rampant. And those films are so badly lit!
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I always felt that the problems of the world would never ever be solved until people came to terms with the deeper issues [spiritual] - that there would be an aimless reshuffling of world leaders and governments and programs.
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