Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Even if God exists, he's done such a terrible job, it's a wonder people don't get together and file a class action suit against him.
Woody Allen
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Even
God
People
Terrible
Wonder
Class
File
Jobs
Files
Action
Suit
Together
Suits
Done
Exists
More quotes by Woody Allen
I got a divorce because my ex-wife left me for another woman.
Woody Allen
No, I don't think you're paranoid. I think you're the opposite of paranoid. I think you walk around with the insane delusion that people like you.
Woody Allen
I always thought it would be very funny if I was a blind film director.
Woody Allen
Visually I've always liked the 20s 30s for film. I do these because I like the music. I like the clothes. I like the way the women and the guys look. There are soldiers and sailors and gangsters with the machine guns in their violin cases. It's a very colorful era of New York, full of great theater and great nightclubs and great jazz.
Woody Allen
Nothing like a little post-traumatic stress disorder to make your day complete.
Woody Allen
I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.
Woody Allen
But what if everyone in the world behaved like me and came here and shot Brisseau through the ear? What a mess! And of course we'd need valet parking.
Woody Allen
You are much more dependent on luck than you think. People say if you want to have a good relationship, you have to work at it. But you never hear it about anything you really like, about sailing or going to soccer games.
Woody Allen
Some people are funny, and some people are not funny. Many people who are not funny can make a living at it. You don't have to be great to make a living at it. Just like a doctor who doesn't have to be great can still make a living out of it.
Woody Allen
You use sex to express every emotion except love.
Woody Allen
Is world peace possible or is the human race too innately aggressive? For instance: Have you ever seen women at a sample sale?
Woody Allen
Child molestation is a touchy subject... Read the papers! Half the country's doing it!
Woody Allen
I, interestingly, had dated a woman in the Eisenhower Administration briefly, and it was ironic to me 'cause I was trying to do toher what Eisenhower has been doing to the country for the last eight years.
Woody Allen
When I was young, I wanted to be a dramatic writer, a writer of tragedy. Nothing would've pleased me more than if I could have written like Eugene O'Neil or Tennessee Williams.
Woody Allen
See, I never gain an ounce, because, you know, my anxiety acts like aerobics.
Woody Allen
I love baseball. You know, it doesn’t have to mean anything. It’s just very beautiful to watch.
Woody Allen
I've always believed that thoughtful people don't really take the tabloids seriously. They're basically a form of entertainment. I enjoy them as much as the next New Yorker.
Woody Allen
Sentence structure is innate, but whining is acquired.
Woody Allen
Man was made in God`s image. Do you really think God has red hair and glasses?
Woody Allen
Where did we come from? Where are we going? Is there possibility of a group discount?
Woody Allen
