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What a world. It could be so wonderful if it wasn't for certain people.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Wonderful
Certain
World
People
Wasn
More quotes by Woody Allen
Let's say there was no terrorism whatsoever and we were all very nice to one another and we were all kind, we still would be faced with an extremely cruel and hostile universe and existence and so I'm a great pessimist and I feel that it's impossible really to be happy, and that the best you can hope for is to be distracted.
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I asked the girl if she could bring a sister for me. She did. Sister Maria Teresa. It was a very slow evening. We discussed the New Testament. We agreed that He was very well adjusted for an only child.
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I don't get depressed I grow a tumor instead.
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Is sex dirty? Only when it's being done right.
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Your still searching for me in every woman. You'll always seek to duplicate what we had. You know it.
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Usually, you hire people that you think are wonderful.
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I was a smart kid and I was not understood by my parents.
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The French make two mistakes about me. They think I'm an intellectual because I wear these glasses and they think I'm an artist because my films lose money.
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Is Knowledge knowable? If not, how do we know?
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Life is full of moments that are good - winning a lottery, seeing a beautiful woman, a great dinner - but the whole thing is tragic. It's an oasis that is very pleasant.
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I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle!
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Dear Mom and Dad, Leave $50,000 in a bag under the bridge on Decatur Street. If there is no bridge on Decatur Street, please build one.
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More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.
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I can do a limited amount of things and that's what I do and I feel comfortable doing it and I have no particular desire to do anything else as an actor.
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I was the captain of the latent paranoid softball team. We used to play all the neurotics on sunday morning. Nailbiters against the bedwetters, and if you've never seen neurotics play softball, it's really funny. I used to steal second base, and feel guilty and go back.
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For some reason it gives people pleasure to equate the life of certain movie actors or actresses with their actual lives.
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If the [actors] are working, and I have a dinner engagement, I don't do 20 takes. I do five takes and go home. I want to go to dinner.
Woody Allen
I don't wanna live on in my work. I wanna live on in my apartment.
Woody Allen
My relationship with American audiences is the exact same as it always has been. They never came to see my films, and they don't come now.
Woody Allen
Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boats.
Woody Allen
