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Until you've been kissed on a rainy Parisian afternoon - you've never been kissed.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Afternoon
Never
Parisian
Rainy
Kissed
More quotes by Woody Allen
Don't think of death as an ending. Think of it as a really effective way of cutting down your expenses.
Woody Allen
My ex-wife was a philosophy major at NYU. Yeah, she and I used to have deep philosophical discussions where she would prove that I didn't exist.
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My grandfather had a wonderful funeral... On the buffet table there was a replica of the deceased in potato salad.
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90 per cent of success is turning up.
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The important thing, I think, is not to be bitter. You know, if it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. I think that the worst thing you could say about him is that basically he's an underachiever. After all, you know, there are worse things in life than death.
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My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.
Woody Allen
I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go down and meet them with baseball bats. (On the KKK)
Woody Allen
I want to return to the womb, anyone's.
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Harvard makes mistakes too, you know. Kissinger taught there.
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All literature is a footnote to Faust. I have no idea what I mean by that.
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In my next life I want to live backwards. Start out dead and finish off as an orgasm.
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As a boy, I was ashamed to wear glasses. I memorized the eye chart, and then on the test they asked essay questions.
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If you can delude yourself by believing that there is some kind of Santa Claus out there who is going to bail you out in the end, then it will help you get through. Even if you are proven wrong in the end, you would have had a better life than a non-believer.
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God, you Jews are truly exotic. Exotic? She should only know the Greenblatts. Or Mr. and Mrs. Milton Sharpstein, my father's friends. Or for that matter, my cousin Tovah. Exotic? I mean, they're nice, but hardly exotic with their endless bickering over the best way to combat indigestion or how far back to sit from the television set.
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Sex on Twitter can't hurt you - unless you fall off.
Woody Allen
Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.
Woody Allen
Is there a separation between body and mind, and if so which is it better to have?
Woody Allen
The history of the world is like: He kills me, I kill him, only with different cosmetics and different castings. So in 2001, some fanatics killed some Americans, and now some Americans are killing some Iraqis. And in my childhood, some Nazis killed Jews. And now, some Jewish people and some Palestinians are killing each other.
Woody Allen
I've always been interested in being in other people's movies. I never get any offers.
Woody Allen
If you aren't failing, you aren't trying.
Woody Allen
