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Sex is like having dinner: sometimes you joke about the dishes, sometimes you take the meal seriously.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Take
Meal
Sometimes
Dishes
Like
Meals
Joke
Seriously
Dinner
Jokes
Sex
More quotes by Woody Allen
You use sex to express every emotion except love.
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In short, the best thing to do is behave in a manner befitting one's age. If you are sixteen or under, try not to go bald.
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If God exists, I hope he has a good excuse.
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I wish I could think of a positive point to leave you with. Will you take two negative points?
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As a boy, I was ashamed to wear glasses. I memorized the eye chart, and then on the test they asked essay questions.
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Music has always helped my films. In 'The Curse Of The Jade Scorpion,' you can hear 'Sunrise' by Glenn Miller, an idol of my childhood, in the surprise ending. I like mixing comedy with suspense and action.
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When the Academy called, I panicked. I thought they might want their Oscars back and the pawn shop has been out of business for a while.
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The prettiest women are almost always the most boring, and that is why some people feel there is no God.
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I did not marry the first girl that I fell in love with, because there was a tremendous religious conflict, at the time. She was an atheist, and I was an agnostic.
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I think there is too much wrong with the world to ever get too relaxed and happy. The more natural state, and the better one, I think, is one of some anxiety and tension over man's plight in this mysterious universe.
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Sex is better than talk. Ask anybody in this bar. Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to sex.
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The meaning of life is that nobody knows the meaning of life.
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You can't anticipate in the room the riches of what you encounter when you're location hunting for a movie.
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I asked the girl if she could bring a sister for me. She did. Sister Maria Teresa. It was a very slow evening. We discussed the New Testament. We agreed that He was very well adjusted for an only child.
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I have an intense desire to return to the womb. Anybody's.
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I've always had an easy time directing actors because I always hire ones that are great before I get my hands on them.
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My wife and I thought we were in love, but it turned out to be benign
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My films are therapy for my debilitating depression. In institutions people weave baskets. I make films.
Woody Allen
All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.
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Let's say there was no terrorism whatsoever and we were all very nice to one another and we were all kind, we still would be faced with an extremely cruel and hostile universe and existence and so I'm a great pessimist and I feel that it's impossible really to be happy, and that the best you can hope for is to be distracted.
Woody Allen
