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I have an intense desire to return to the womb. Anybody's.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Intense
Anybody
Return
Funny
Desire
Womb

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What a world. It could be so wonderful if it wasn't for certain people.
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I don't fear death. - I just don't want to be around when it happens.
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There are worse things than death. Many of them playing at a theater near you.
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I think, on both sides of the camera or the novel: Distraction. I'm obsessed with: Can I get this actress or my third act to work? I'm distracted. I'm interested in that so I don't sit home and think, Gee, life is meaningless. We're all going to die. The universe is pulling apart at breakneck speed.
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If God is everywhere, I had concluded, then He is in food. Therefore, the more I ate the godlier I would become. Impelled by this new religious fervor, I glutted myself like a fanatic.
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Sex on Twitter can't hurt you - unless you fall off.
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History is the same thing over and over again.
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Geez, I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get, and just enjoy it while it lasts.
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Maybe the poets are right. Maybe love is the only answer.
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Dear Mom and Dad, Leave $50,000 in a bag under the bridge on Decatur Street. If there is no bridge on Decatur Street, please build one.
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Not think of death as an end, but think of it more as a very effective way of cutting down on your expenses.
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Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
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I always feel, I guess being a product of the movies of the 40s where movies were the greatest things and screens were big and palaces were palaces and stars were larger than life that reality was so much inferior to what we felt was conceivably possible from what we had seen in the movies.
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Notes for a ballet, The Spell: ... Suddenly Sigmund hears the flutter of wings, and a group of wild swans flies across the moon ... Sigmund is astounded to see that their leader is part swan and part woman - unfortunately, divided lengthwise. She enchants Sigmund, who is careful not to make any poultry jokes.
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