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Eternity is really long, especially near the end.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Eternity
Especially
Funny
Ends
Long
Really
Hilarious
Near

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It's easier to direct. If you direct something poorly and re-shoot it the next day, stage it better, make it work better, you have a lot of possibilities. You can edit it in certain ways so that it works, but there's no getting around weaknesses of the script.
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My parents were very Old World. They come from Brooklyn, which is the heart of the Old World. Their values in life are God and carpeting.
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Is there a separation between body and mind, and if so which is it better to have?
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Spencer was searching for a woman interested in gold, inorganic chemistry, outdoor sex and the music of Bach. In short, he was looking for himself, only female.
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I do occasionally envy the person who is religious naturally, without being brainwashed into it or suckered into it by all the organized hustles.
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People still have existential anxiety. It just may not be expressed in Hebraic idiom.
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My relationship with death remains the same - I'm strongly against it.
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You're still in love' 'No I'm not, I'm not She'll always be a part of me, and she's an important person in my life but for the two of us something wasn't working.' 'What element?' 'We never found out
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Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.
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I can't understand why more people aren't bisexual. It would double your chances for a date on Saturday night.
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All my life is passing in front of my eyes. The worst part of it is I'm driving a used car.
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If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
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Life is like a concentration camp... you can't leave without dying.
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Astronomers say the universe is finite, which is a comforting thought for those people who can't remember where they leave things.
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Change is almost always negative. Things degenerate.
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When you are dead, it is hard to find the light switch.
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Tradition is the illusion of permanance.
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I always feel the cynicism is reality with maybe an alternate spelling or something because I feel that I have real perspective on this particular issue of punishment in society.
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One man starving puts a crimp in my evening.
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I always write the same way. I always write with a yellow pad and a ballpoint pen on my bed. And then I go and type it up afterwards. I've always done that. Those things become habitual.
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