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I wish I could think of a positive point to leave you with. Will you take two negative points?
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Funny
Wish
Points
Two
Clever
Take
Negative
Think
Smart
Thinking
Positive
Leave
Point
More quotes by Woody Allen
I don't want to live forever through my work. I want to live forever by not dying.
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Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought-particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things.
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Relationships are really what interest me the most. And I think, in the end, they interest most people the most. Even when you read Tolstoy or something, basically they're about man and woman relationships.
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I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
Woody Allen
If you take a frown and turn it upside down, the person you are holding by the ankles will soon pass out.
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I'm awash in self-contempt!
Woody Allen
I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic.
Woody Allen
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
Woody Allen
You are much more dependent on luck than you think. People say if you want to have a good relationship, you have to work at it. But you never hear it about anything you really like, about sailing or going to soccer games.
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Today I saw a red and yellow sunset and thought, how insignificant I am! Of course, I thought that yesterday too, and it rained.
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My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.
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I think that the tendency for most people is to fall back on a comic interpretation of things because things are so sad, so terrible. If you didn't laugh you'd kill yourself. But the truth of the matter is that existence in general is very very tragic, very very sad, very brutal and very unhappy.
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I wouldn't mind dying so much if it wasn't that I would be dead at the end of it.
Woody Allen
I can't even make a leap of faith to believe in my own existence.
Woody Allen
There are worse things than death. Many of them playing at a theater near you.
Woody Allen
Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
Woody Allen
Tradition is the illusion of permanance.
Woody Allen
Fantasy is only a state of mind that you can employ when existing in a real context.
Woody Allen
I'm not a big believer in the sense of Jews having a monopoly on comedy.
Woody Allen
In certain areas I don't function well and in other areas I function very well. I'm very good professionally. I have good discipline, I'm able to write every day and do films and not go six times over the budget. I mean I'm a coherent person, but I also don't like to go through tunnels when I travel. I'm claustrophobic.
Woody Allen
