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The difference between sex and death is, death you can do alone and nobody laughs at you.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Difference
Laughing
Nobody
Differences
Alone
Death
Masturbation
Laughs
Sex

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Dying is like making love, except you don't get naseous afterwards.
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We laughed over it, and Hemingway punched me in the mouth.
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I keep getting more and more ambitious. Over the years, to some degree, in some areas, I feel I've grown. In some areas, I made a fool of myself. In some areas, I think I can still do some funny things.
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All i have in my life is my imagination
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When we lose twenty pounds... we may be losing the twenty best pounds we have! We may be losing the pounds that contain our genius, our humanity, our love and honesty.
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The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.
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Man cannot live by bread alone. Every once in awhile he needs a salad.
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It's funny. Maria Elena and I, we are meant for each other and not meant for each other, it's a contradiction.
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See, I will always have this penchant for what I call kamikaze women. I call them kamikazes because they, you know they crash their plane, they're self-destructive. But they crash into you, and you die along with them.
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I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
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The prettiest women are almost always the most boring, and that is why some people feel there is no God.
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Side Effects Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on the weekend. Woody Allen Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.
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The content dictates the style all the time. That's the way it is. If the content of the film - as in Husbands and Wives - is highly jagged, neurotic, fast-paced, nervous New York film, it just called for that kind of shooting, editing and performance.
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Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.
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