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Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Done
Right
Humorous
Dirty
Sex
Funny
More quotes by Woody Allen
Believing would be easier if God would show himself by depositing a million dollars in a Swiss bank account in my name
Woody Allen
It's a wonderful thing to be able to create your own world whenever you want to.
Woody Allen
There's no correlation between what the public likes and what I'm after. I'm in a different world.
Woody Allen
I should have known something was wrong with my first wife. When I brought her home to meet my parents, they approved of her.
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In certain areas I don't function well and in other areas I function very well. I'm very good professionally. I have good discipline, I'm able to write every day and do films and not go six times over the budget. I mean I'm a coherent person, but I also don't like to go through tunnels when I travel. I'm claustrophobic.
Woody Allen
My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.
Woody Allen
Chastity is curable, if detected early.
Woody Allen
Who's the bigger idiot, the idiot or the idiot who gets fooled by the idiot?
Woody Allen
And in all of Babylonia there was wailing and gnashing of teeth, 'til the prophets bade the multitudes get a grip on themselves and shape up.
Woody Allen
I've always believed that thoughtful people don't really take the tabloids seriously. They're basically a form of entertainment. I enjoy them as much as the next New Yorker.
Woody Allen
My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker.
Woody Allen
For God sakes, this is a woman I was married to for 10 years. We made love. I'd hold her head over the toilet bowl when she threw up.
Woody Allen
Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.
Woody Allen
To be a film director is not a democracy, it's really a tyranny. You're the head of the project, for better rather than worse. I write the film and I direct the film, I decide who's going to be in it, I decide on the editing, I put in the music from my own record collection.
Woody Allen
Well, if I don't get at least 16 hours, I'm a basket case.
Woody Allen
God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.
Woody Allen
Nothing worth knowing can be understood with the mind.
Woody Allen
Can you believe that? She says I'm not leader enough for her. Who was she looking for... Hitler?
Woody Allen
I was thrown out of NYU for cheating-with the deans wife
Woody Allen
No, I don't think you're paranoid. I think you're the opposite of paranoid. I think you walk around with the insane delusion that people like you.
Woody Allen