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Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Right
Humorous
Dirty
Sex
Funny
Done
More quotes by Woody Allen
Existence for eternity could get a little boring... especially towards the end.
Woody Allen
Raised by two mothers...wow, most of us barely survive one
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There are three things Jewish people worship-God, Chinese food and wall-to-wall carpeting.
Woody Allen
I think universal harmony is a pipedream and it may be more productive to focus on more modest goals, like a ban on yodeling.
Woody Allen
Let's say there was no terrorism whatsoever and we were all very nice to one another and we were all kind, we still would be faced with an extremely cruel and hostile universe and existence and so I'm a great pessimist and I feel that it's impossible really to be happy, and that the best you can hope for is to be distracted.
Woody Allen
Someday the lion is going to lie down with the lamb, but the lamb isn't going to get much sleep.
Woody Allen
But what if everyone in the world behaved like me and came here and shot Brisseau through the ear? What a mess! And of course we'd need valet parking.
Woody Allen
People make films for different reasons. For money. Or, they make them because something in them demands artistic expression. I do it because I enjoy the work.
Woody Allen
If God exists, I hope he has a good excuse.
Woody Allen
Every hooker I ever speak to tells me that it beats the hell out of waitressing.
Woody Allen
I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.
Woody Allen
Paranoia is knowing all the facts.
Woody Allen
I feel humor is important for those two reasons: that it is a little bit of refreshment like music, and that women have told me over the years that it is very, very important to them.
Woody Allen
How is it possible to find meaning in a finite world, given my waist and shirt size?
Woody Allen
In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows.
Woody Allen
I've always believed that thoughtful people don't really take the tabloids seriously. They're basically a form of entertainment. I enjoy them as much as the next New Yorker.
Woody Allen
I recently turned 60. Practically a third of my life is over.
Woody Allen
It's easier to direct. If you direct something poorly and re-shoot it the next day, stage it better, make it work better, you have a lot of possibilities. You can edit it in certain ways so that it works, but there's no getting around weaknesses of the script.
Woody Allen
Better not think too much. Relying more on the body: it is more trustworthy.
Woody Allen
Hey listen -- I've proved a lot of things. That's how I pay my rent. Theories and little observations. A puckish remark now and then. Occasional maxims. It beats picking olives, but let's not get carried away.
Woody Allen
