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I learned a few things on my own since, and modified some of the things he taught me, but everything, unequivocally, that I learned about comedy writing I learned from Danny Simon.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Simon
Learned
Comedy
Taught
Since
Everything
Unequivocally
Writing
Danny
Things
Modified
More quotes by Woody Allen
God, you Jews are truly exotic. Exotic? She should only know the Greenblatts. Or Mr. and Mrs. Milton Sharpstein, my father's friends. Or for that matter, my cousin Tovah. Exotic? I mean, they're nice, but hardly exotic with their endless bickering over the best way to combat indigestion or how far back to sit from the television set.
Woody Allen
If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right.
Woody Allen
Raised by two mothers...wow, most of us barely survive one
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I am told the settlement of $5 million I am being paid is the largest amount ever paid under the New York right to privacy law
Woody Allen
Do I believe in God? I did until Mother's accident. She fell on some meat loaf and it penetrated her spleen.
Woody Allen
The best things in life are censored.
Woody Allen
I can live in Paris for four months or London or, you know, Barcelona. These are places that are like New York. But I don't think I could live in many places. When I had to make a film in the United States I picked San Francisco because to me it's one of the great cities of America.
Woody Allen
We Are The Sum Total Of Our Choices.
Woody Allen
Honey, you're the one who stopped sleeping with me, OK? It'll be a year come April 20th. I remember the date exactly, because it was Hitler's birthday
Woody Allen
When you make the film, there's a big difference between when you're in your own home at the typewriter, and when you're standing on a mountain, or on a street corner, and buses are coming by-it's a different reality. You make a million changes that were never in the script, but that reality dictates.
Woody Allen
Once munching has begun, Schopenhauer held, the human will cannot resist further munching, and the result is a universe with crumbs over everything.
Woody Allen
The whole country was tied together by radio. We all experienced the same heroes and comedians and singers. They were giants.
Woody Allen
My wife is immature. Whenever I take a bath, she sinks my boats.
Woody Allen
If 90% of success in life is showing up, the other 10% depends on what you're showing up for.
Woody Allen
I wonder if Socrates and Plato took a house on Crete during the summer.
Woody Allen
A Bay Area Bisexual told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.
Woody Allen
If my soul exists without my body I am convinced all my clothes will be loose-fitting
Woody Allen
When I'm not working, I think and I think when I get depressed.
Woody Allen
You're so good looking I can barely keep my eyes on the meter.
Woody Allen
I've had bad luck in my two previous marriages. The first wife left me, and the second did not.
Woody Allen